what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
