That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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