Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Randomize
