What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
i just google imaged poop.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
