I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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