Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
