so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
that is very illegal...i love you.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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