Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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