I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize