So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize