Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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