Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize