I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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