I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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