Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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