Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
