When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
