So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
