My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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