He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Randomize
