can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
