Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
