At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
