So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Randomize
