Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Randomize
