So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
