There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Randomize