I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
