Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
