I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
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