Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
