it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
