Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
