Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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