I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
