why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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