so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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