But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
