Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
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