Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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