You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
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