you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
