shes about as inviting as chlamydia
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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