i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
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