Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
