I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
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