u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize