his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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