im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Just high enough for therapy.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize