I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Operation Purity has been aborted
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Randomize
