i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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